I’m mentally worn from running this week. Most people think of running as a physical activity, but to me the mental challenge is even more exhausting. The whole week I had to push myself through my workouts. My week went something like this:
1) Tues, cold run (previous post)
2) Wed when I completed my 10miles early in the morning before work on a treadmill (rainy day); it was painful to say the least
3) Friday when I pushed through 8.1 Miles outdoors (on a gorgeous morning!) looping around the East and West rivers. My alarm clock went off at 6am and I snoozed it until 7am when I finally just had to DO it. I was not in the mood to run and had to push myself ever minute. It took all the will power I had not to stop at wall street and take the 4/5 train back to my apartment, but I completed my loop!
Sunday was the only day I actually had the motivation to run! I did 12 miles for the first time! I felt amazing and amazingly tired. It’s amazing (not to overuse the word) what you can do if you put your mind to it — which brings me back to the beginning of my post and suggestion of mental running. When I run it’s all a motivational challenge to continue pushing through; pushing through the physical pain, convincing myself that I’m making myself stronger; pushing through those moments of exhaustion when you just want to retreat to your bed; even pushing myself to get out of bed in the morning!
It’s been about 2 months since I’ve embarked on my journey of becoming a runner and I’ve gone from 0 – 12miles. I got to tell you after all the running I’ve done, I still haven’t experienced that sheer enjoyment of running. Don’t get me wrong, running does give me a high of sort and I feel better at the end of the day, but I still am not excited about waking up and running. Part of the issue may be that I’ve made running an obligation instead of a hobbie; in a sense it’s become a chore. I have my mind set on finishing this 1/2 marathon in 2 weeks without walking one step and I am going to do that, but that kind of mind set has made my training a little grueling.
2 more weeks, then I need to equalize my running and my life.